A Message From Dr Grace Dammann about States of Grace

P eople have asked me how I decided to participate in the film States of Grace. When we started, I'd been in the hospital for well over a year, and I thought, " Of course this makes sense. " My attitude toward pretty much everything that comes my way in life is to just say " yes " and pick up the pieces. So my attitude was Just say " yes " because you've had an incredible experience—both because you're a physician and because you've been such a patient. If you don't have anything to say to help people with this, nobody does. Right away, I was very comfortable with both [film-makers] Mark [Lipman] and Helen [Cohen], and they just immediately faded into the background. I realized early on that I was in an incredible situation getting to have my experience documented. I didn't actually look at any of the film for the first 2 years. Initially, I think I didn't want to see it until it was done because I felt I might contaminate it by becoming self-conscious. I went through the process thinking, This is their story about my story, and hopefully we will all get something out of it. What I wanted was a teaching tool for medical students, physicians, physical therapists, and family members who are dealing with caregiver and care-receiver issues. I was just thinking that this could ultimately be of service because I wanted something good to come out of my accident , not just for me but for everybody. There was one time when I think we all would have liked to stop the project. I was so depressed about the fact of how disabled I'd become that I really felt such despair. It wasn't about stopping the filming; it was more about, " How is this ever going to end in a good way? " I was so distraught, so upset. But I thought, " The show must go on. " Now, watching the finished film, I have to witness the fact that that was totally a real part of my experience; it's honest. It would be nicer if I were a little better packaged, but I wasn't and that was the reality! And that is actually part of what makes the film stand on its own 2 legs—there was no part where any of us was trying to sugarcoat things. I …